tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24906392237617668642024-03-19T10:11:56.149+00:00Orchard Green ParentingA lifeline for mums everywhere.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comBlogger45125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-21638437167616653682016-07-13T13:56:00.003+01:002016-07-13T13:56:47.378+01:00Do Babies Dream?If you have ever watched a baby sleeping (and if you're a parent I bet you have!) you will have seen them twitch and move in their sleep. You have probably wondered if they were dreaming, and if so what they might be dreaming about.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPYReZ_oAQnYfBZr5V-e3OAzniXiQeMe34Kt_0lXttLiL6kIKuYMFf3AfAJvHGO2j2FhCibnHAThYwUYrokk6dMZOvVyk3afhBYLVYuSito7hleuemRiM6x7yGsc8auKvwuf4iC4OiIq4/s1600/12742713_1041444969252447_1585267881597858918_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPYReZ_oAQnYfBZr5V-e3OAzniXiQeMe34Kt_0lXttLiL6kIKuYMFf3AfAJvHGO2j2FhCibnHAThYwUYrokk6dMZOvVyk3afhBYLVYuSito7hleuemRiM6x7yGsc8auKvwuf4iC4OiIq4/s400/12742713_1041444969252447_1585267881597858918_n.jpg" width="300" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
The short answer is that we don't know, we can't ask them to find out. But we can look at clues and try to make an educated guess. Adults dream during REM sleep, that sleep where you can see a person's eyes moving about behind their eyelids, especially in the later part of the night. Babies do experience REM, in fact they have more REM than adults, so it seems logical to suppose that they might dream.<br />
<br />
So what do they dream about? Well, that might not actually be the best question. As adults we think of dreams as being <em>about</em> something, they have a plotline however crazy or mundane that might be. We also experience the world in that way, as a story. We talk about the things that have happened, cause and effect, a sequence of events. If we have an emotion we like to be able to say we feel that way because of something that has happened and we get really annoyed when that isn't the case. Unusual emotions as a result of hormones or illness really throw us, why are you crying when you have nothing to be sad about?? We dream the way we experience life, as a story produced from a jumble of things we've seen or done.<br />
<br />
So how does a newborn baby experience the world? Again, we don't really know for sure since we can't ask them but it seems likely that it's not as a sequence of events. Probably more like a cloud of disembodied sensations and emotions. Strong arms, the sound of a familiar voice, contentment, hunger, sucking, the flavour of milk, the shock of a cold baby wipe, movement, a heartbeat, a familiar smell, contentment again. A newborn is swimming in a soup of sights, sounds and feelings that don't have a plot. They don't have to, they simply are what they are.<br />
<br />
My guess (and it is only my guess) is that a baby's dream would be similar. Perhaps they recall a snatch of that lullaby you sang, or the feel of Daddy's arms holding them. They might see a face coming into focus or remember the taste of warm milk. A baby might feel warm, content, secure and safe in dreams just as they do in life. <br />
<br />
We will probably never know for sure, but that's what I choose to believe! What do you think?<br />
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-55451883940150416922016-06-09T09:32:00.001+01:002016-06-09T09:32:41.917+01:00Our nappy routineA few people have asked me about using washable nappies, isn't it a lot of work? I actually find it really easy, here's what we do.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-86bQJyJ3nGA/V1g_SjS4OwI/AAAAAAAAHCU/zLkntJNLbjMz2pRya7PQOscc4KM7NOJwQCKgB/s1600/2016%2B-%2B2" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-86bQJyJ3nGA/V1g_SjS4OwI/AAAAAAAAHCU/zLkntJNLbjMz2pRya7PQOscc4KM7NOJwQCKgB/s320/2016%2B-%2B2" width="240" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
This is our changing area. Instead of an expensive changing table we have used an ordinary chest of drawers, it will be useful for years and since it fits in the alcove I didn't even have to add a safety rail! That means all the baby clothes are to hand as well as the nappies, which is great when you realise you need a new vest half way through a change!<br />
<br />
The nappy bucket is right there, with a lid to keep the smells in, and the box of washable wipes fits on top next to the changing mat. Finally there's a mobile which my husband made out of airfix kits. William loves to watch the planes spin round and it keeps him happily occupied so he isn't wriggling about too much!<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-cZOP2V9m7ng/V1g_SrQCM0I/AAAAAAAAHCQ/C2NnY0215bc5ecHcW7TsCX1P_6HF9zz8ACKgB/s1600/2016%2B-%2B3" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-cZOP2V9m7ng/V1g_SrQCM0I/AAAAAAAAHCQ/C2NnY0215bc5ecHcW7TsCX1P_6HF9zz8ACKgB/s320/2016%2B-%2B3" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
The top drawer has all the changing things, nappies, wraps, liners and other bits and bobs like nappy cream (which we very rarely use). Everything is always in easy reach, no need to leave a baby on the changing mat to fetch something. And for those parents with a bad back or a C-section scar - no need to bend down!<br />
<br />
So, how do we use the nappies? Well, there are lots of different types and they are all slightly different but the ones we have just go on exactly like a disposable and do up with Velcro. They have a nice thick booster pad and a fleece liner sewn in already so you really don't have to do anything, although with a bigger baby on solid foods I might add a separate liner. Then the waterproof wrap goes over the top, again it does up with Velcro just like a disposable. <br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-XT7Mh9OTMSo/V1g_SqbA31I/AAAAAAAAHCU/YDSlWnJswRcgu6nOo_yRuOctxFPxtj_NACKgB/s1600/2016%2B-%2B1" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-XT7Mh9OTMSo/V1g_SqbA31I/AAAAAAAAHCU/YDSlWnJswRcgu6nOo_yRuOctxFPxtj_NACKgB/s400/2016%2B-%2B1" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
When it's time to change the nappy I just take it off and put it in the lidded bucket. The wrap can do quite a few changes before it needs to be washed. Currently we only have breastmilk poo to deal with, when things get more solid they will need to be flushed down the loo, which is where the disposable liners can come in handy. But for now that's it. No soaking, no rinsing, it's no more work than throwing a disposable in the bin. Then every two or three days I pop the whole lot in the washing machine (no more work than emptying the rubbish bin!). The kind of nappies I use can be tumble dried and we have a washer-drier so depending on the weather I might hang them up or I might just set it to wash and dry. Then pop the dry nappies back in the drawer ready for next time. At least I don't have to carry a new packet home from the shops!<br />
<br />
The wipes we use are just as easy, little cloths that fit in a plastic box with just enough water to make them damp. I put them in the bucket with the nappies, wash them and when the box is empty just put the stack of dry wipes in with some fresh water. You can actually put them straight in the box from the washing machine, still damp, but this routine suits me so I'm going with it. I love our washable wipes! I'm even considering getting a second box to do the same as cleaning wipes around the kitchen.<br />
<br />
Have you tried washable nappies? Would you consider it? I'd love to hear your thoughts!<br />
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-56779214333531057452016-06-02T15:50:00.000+01:002016-06-02T15:50:40.502+01:00Best Ever Dribble BibMy little man has been dribbling like crazy recently so when I heard about brand new business<a href="http://lyddi-grace.co.uk/" target="_blank"> Lyddi Grace Designs</a> I thought I would try them out!<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-EvKviPI_Et0/V1BBTIQOATI/AAAAAAAAHBY/GK8za2Gggu8cVxCnXTV0KFxbPzYPE4i7ACKgB/s1600/2016%2B-%2B1" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-EvKviPI_Et0/V1BBTIQOATI/AAAAAAAAHBY/GK8za2Gggu8cVxCnXTV0KFxbPzYPE4i7ACKgB/s640/2016%2B-%2B1" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
Of course you can use an ordinary bib but they tend to look a bit out of place if it isn't a mealtime, and look babyish on a toddler. Plus they usually cover much more of the chest than is really necessary and often aren't absorbent enough. Typical dribble bibs are a bandana style in bright colours which look much better and are more absorbent but tend to gather up in lots of folds under the baby's chin, which I always think looks uncomfortable. <br />
<br />
The <a href="http://lyddi-grace.co.uk/" target="_blank">Lyddi Grace dribble bib</a> is a bandana type shape but designed to lie flat instead of gathering under the baby's chin. It also comes in a whole range of gorgeous patterns and colours, and a choice of two different backing fabrics.<br />
<br />
Ours arrived this morning and I'm really impressed with it. The cotton fabric is nice and sturdy and the fleece backing is beautifully soft against baby's skin as well as providing a water resistant layer. It fits nicely, fastening with poppers that allow for two different sizes and will last better than a velcro fastening would. It certainly seems comfortable and did it's job well, even after a lot of dribbly bubble blowing the top underneath stayed dry.<br />
<br />
Lydia hand makes all her bibs beautifully and is really helpful too, so I'm so pleased to be able to support her and recommend her lie flat bibs wholeheartedly. I'm sure I'll be buying more!<br />
<br />
(PS This is not a sponsored post, in fact they don't even know I'm writing it. Just an honest review which I hope you find useful.)Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-83063969152748163672016-05-23T14:09:00.000+01:002016-06-22T08:11:30.357+01:005 things to do when you dont have time to cook<!-- Facebook Pixel Code -->
<script>
!function(f,b,e,v,n,t,s){if(f.fbq)return;n=f.fbq=function(){n.callMethod?
n.callMethod.apply(n,arguments):n.queue.push(arguments)};if(!f._fbq)f._fbq=n;
n.push=n;n.loaded=!0;n.version='2.0';n.queue=[];t=b.createElement(e);t.async=!0;
t.src=v;s=b.getElementsByTagName(e)[0];s.parentNode.insertBefore(t,s)}(window,
document,'script','//connect.facebook.net/en_US/fbevents.js');
fbq('init', '641563809280381');
fbq('track', "PageView");</script>
<noscript><img height="1" width="1" style="display:none"
src="https://www.facebook.com/tr?id=641563809280381&ev=PageView&noscript=1"
/></noscript>
<!-- End Facebook Pixel Code -->
It seems like such a nice idea, wholesome food cooked from scratch with love. What better way to nurture your young family? The trouble is, even if you love cooking some days you want to go to a toddler group, or school run is at exactly the wrong time, or you are just too busy. So how can you provide a nutritious, home cooked meal when you simply don't have time to cook?<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjU0k3nnyh4vPhAyMBX-6Godt19SCy_IEnE6P776yVn2hxV-_AujQRaQSDgxzQUwDHurt8ZVxHD6SKPMZErTRHjn8wWP1mqPiLl-5xrne7g08971L-UqeiTmVe0e95wsMrGAyWwOQWAWxU/s1600/cooking.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjU0k3nnyh4vPhAyMBX-6Godt19SCy_IEnE6P776yVn2hxV-_AujQRaQSDgxzQUwDHurt8ZVxHD6SKPMZErTRHjn8wWP1mqPiLl-5xrne7g08971L-UqeiTmVe0e95wsMrGAyWwOQWAWxU/s400/cooking.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<h4 class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
1. Use a slow cooker</h4>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Slow cookers are great, and not just for stews! You can put all the ingredients in before you go out and come home to a hot meal that just needs to be served up. Some have a cooking time of just two or three hours, which will be perfect for lunchtime and others cook all day while you are out on adventures. You could do jacket potatoes or soup for a light lunch, bolognaise sauce that just needs some quickly cooked pasta or a lightly spiced tagine style stew. Yum! If you have an aga you can use the slow oven in exactly the same way, bringing the food to a boil before putting it in. I've been know to start a stew in the aga 24 hours before we needed to eat it!</div>
<h4 class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
</h4>
<h4 class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
2. Use the oven timer</h4>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
A lot of ovens these days come with timers and can be set to turn themselves on and off at certain times. This is perfect if you know you'll be in at an exact time, after the school run or a class for example. Just put the food in the oven before you go out and program it to turn on half an hour before you get home. Obviously you will want to be careful of putting things like raw fish in the oven at room temperature for hours so this method might be best for vegetarian dishes or times when you wont be out of the house for too long. I tend to program it to be ready ten minutes after I plan to get home, and to turn off automatically, just incase we get delayed.</div>
<h4 class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
</h4>
<h4 class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
3. Use leftovers</h4>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
If you know you have a busy day coming up why not cook extra the night before and just have leftovers? Lots of leftovers can be turned into new dishes too, especially things like plain cooked meat and vegetables, which can become a stir fry, a frittata or a pie in next to no time. Bolognaise can become a lasagne (which you can then put in the slow cooker or in the oven on a timer) or add a few beans and spices for chilli. </div>
<h4 class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
</h4>
<h4 class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
4. Use quick cook foods</h4>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
On busy days you don't have to produce a roast dinner or cheese soufflé (you never have to produce soufflé unless you want to!) There is nothing wrong with having a few quick meals on hand for when you want to go out, or to pull out when plans go wrong. Scrambles eggs on toast served with fruit and yogurt covers all the food groups and will be ready in minutes. </div>
<h4 class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
</h4>
<h4 class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
5. Use your freezer</h4>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Ok, so this won't help you much if your freezer only contains icecream, but it is a useful tool to combine with the other tools. Why not make an extra pasta bake next time and freeze it? Then cook it using the oven timer? Slow cooker meal kits (or "dump bags") are so quick and easy to do, and home made chicken nuggets can be cooked from frozen. It takes a little bit of planning but you'll be so grateful on busy days, sometimes I manage to only cook once a week! </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<h4 class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
PS</h4>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
I'm not saying every meal has be cooked from scratch, everyone has different ideas about using packets, tins and ready made food. You might be happy with opening a tin most days, or occasionally, or not at all. That's fine by me, you know what's best for your family!</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<h4>
Easy Family Food</h4>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
If you are struggling to find time to cook delicious food every day then my new course is perfect for you. <a href="http://bit.ly/easyfamilyfood" target="_blank">Easy Family Food</a> is all about letting dinner make itself while you get out of the kitchen and get on with life! </div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-74369414176598738362016-05-19T13:44:00.000+01:002016-05-23T14:14:03.897+01:00What is sleeping through the night?Following on from last week's blog post we have been talking about babies "sleeping through the night," sometimes seen as the holy grail of early parenting! The question is, what does sleeping through the night actually mean?<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCvAfOmde4Drl5sH7d5AE3oXJIGFvL5n5zbF5j9rVE1OYrAcou5Eaf0ehjxb_hLk4K54vXnFx5vdKIWDO_DjmLGGqRu-BFHYXu_juX-6M2tISjGoFfDJ8osXkTJnvXGdnAM8FYpp62BSw/s1600/Fotolia_56830027_Subscription_Monthly_M.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="290" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCvAfOmde4Drl5sH7d5AE3oXJIGFvL5n5zbF5j9rVE1OYrAcou5Eaf0ehjxb_hLk4K54vXnFx5vdKIWDO_DjmLGGqRu-BFHYXu_juX-6M2tISjGoFfDJ8osXkTJnvXGdnAM8FYpp62BSw/s400/Fotolia_56830027_Subscription_Monthly_M.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
Some doctors and experts consider sleeping through to be an unbroken stretch of sleep from midnight to 5am, only five hours. Most new parents are glad of that much sleep but wouldn't call it sleeping through!<br />
<br />
Some sleep experts and books call sleeping through, either generally or in babies under a certain age, unbroken sleep from a late evening "dream feed" until morning. Usually eight or nine hours, which gives a tired mama the chance of a reasonable night's sleep. <br />
<br />
Other people don't think a baby (or toddler) is really sleeping through until they can go from their bedtime all the way to morning without waking - eleven or twelve hours. That's long enough for mum and dad to have a child free evening and a good night's sleep.<br />
<br />
So, do all these different definitions matter? Ultimately, no. Whatever you call it your baby will develop the ability to sleep for longer stretches gradually and in their own time so it doesn't really matter what label you use! <br />
<br />
The problem is, parents do like to compare their babies. If someone tells you their baby slept through at just a few days old, they might be talking about a five hour stretch. Meanwhile you're still waiting for your baby to go twelve hours and feeling like you're falling behind! What if your baby sleeps for eight hours every night but instead of 11pm to 7am (through the night) she likes to sleep from 7pm to 3am. It's still eight hours, just less convenient for the adults. <br />
<br />
All babies are different, they all grow at their own rate and they develop the ability to sleep for longer stretches when they are ready (if you need help with that, do ask me!) Being able to tick off a milestone is always fun, but when you chat to other mums remember that you might well be comparing apples and oranges. And if you're talking to a doctor, health visitor or other medical professional, always question exactly what they mean by "sleeping through."Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-69882164162291779162016-05-11T09:22:00.000+01:002016-05-11T12:27:21.488+01:00Surviving on no sleep<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
We all know that newborn babies don't exactly sleep well, even those who love to sleep will need regular feeds and some struggle to settle, or have reflux, or just don't sleep for any number of reasons.</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
There are lots of things you can do to gently guide your newborn towards better sleep, and eventually sleeping through the night, but in the meantime night wakings are going to be a part of your life. The question is, how do you function during the day?</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirzHEnI0-Rmegbtcac1qJSUZWBldqrYShpYq7M7BC52EK4ClB17RiqdFpxA295S_yqD6Z4ppScKVbPsP_acgy-o4BpArUeW3Z18hsmIivocHoTYtFvLhr3t9aEMdlu12vXglMDe9Pe_II/s1600/Fotolia_97049462_Subscription_Monthly_M.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirzHEnI0-Rmegbtcac1qJSUZWBldqrYShpYq7M7BC52EK4ClB17RiqdFpxA295S_yqD6Z4ppScKVbPsP_acgy-o4BpArUeW3Z18hsmIivocHoTYtFvLhr3t9aEMdlu12vXglMDe9Pe_II/s320/Fotolia_97049462_Subscription_Monthly_M.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<h4>
Emergency Sleep</h4>
If you have had less than four hours sleep in the last 24 hours then you are in desperate need of rest. The same can apply after very disrupted sleep for weeks or months. In that situation you are not safe to drive, not safe to share a bed with your baby, and can't function properly - although you might think you can. Life really is a struggle at that point, both physically and emotionally, and you are in desperate need of some emergency sleep.<br />
<br />
This is the time when you need to rope in someone else, your partner, your mother, an understanding friend or a nanny. It doesn't have to be overnight, if they can only manage daytime, you are tired enough to sleep no matter what. First of all, if you are breastfeeding, express as much milk as you can. Then go to sleep while your helper cares for the baby somewhere where they wont disturb you. Have the breast pump set up near your bed so that if you wake with sore breasts you can just express quickly and go straight back to sleep. Don't get out of bed until you can't sleep any more. I heard of one mum who slept for a full 24 hours!<br />
<br />
The world will seem like a whole new place in the morning.<br />
<h4>
Prioritise Rest</h4>
Make rest one of your most important priorities, right after making sure both you and the baby get fed. Yes, it's that old saying "sleep when the baby sleeps." I know it's tempting to use nap time to run round and get jobs done but housework really can take a back seat for a while. Clean laundry wont mean much if you are hallucinating through exhaustion. At least once a day either settle your baby for a nap or take them to bed with you (<a href="http://orchardgreenparenting.blogspot.co.uk/2015/04/making-bedsharing-safe.html" target="_blank">make your bed safe first</a>) and rest, just lying down makes a big difference and if you fall asleep so much the better. <br />
<br />
<h4>
Use your Mornings</h4>
Mornings tend to be the easiest time, babies often nap well or are in their sunniest moods and you are as well rested as you are going to get. So make use of them! Do everything you possibly can first thing, from putting on the laundry and emptying the dishwasher to chopping the veg for dinner or even sticking it in the slowcooker. Later on in the day when you are really exhausted and the baby is grumpy you'll be thankful that you don't have to worry about cooking dinner. Plus you can get some rest in the evening, or even an early night, instead of staying up late to wash the dishes. <br />
<br />
<h4>
Get Things Done When Baby is Awake</h4>
Again, you want to be able to put your feet up when baby sleeps, and that means getting things done when she's awake. Get to know the things your baby likes best and build them into your routine. Does she love the sound of running water? Then she may well be happy in her bouncy chair while you have a shower or do the washing up. If he likes motion then try popping him in a sling while you dust and hoover. This approach kills two birds with one stone, you get things done and entertain your baby at the same time!<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-4891005169014690012016-04-14T21:41:00.003+01:002016-04-14T21:41:27.757+01:00Growing up fastI've been a bit quiet recently. I was busy, and I know that you understand why blogging wasn't at the top of my mind while I brought this lovely chap into the world.<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-BfJHnDCT1-0/Vw__xv_WbrI/AAAAAAAAG2g/RbpE09OIFjsWf-FLR3oMfhUjASEmLGuTQCKgB/s1600/2016%2B-%2B2" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://2.bp.blogspot.com/-BfJHnDCT1-0/Vw__xv_WbrI/AAAAAAAAG2g/RbpE09OIFjsWf-FLR3oMfhUjASEmLGuTQCKgB/s320/2016%2B-%2B2" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
Today I read a <a href="http://www.kristinagrum.com/2016/03/dear-halfway-done.html?m=1" target="_blank">blog post,</a> where a mum looks back on the early years and how she wished them away, always longing for the next stage. I know some people who feel the same, excited to see their little one learn to walk or longing for first words. Always looking forwards to when a baby can finally hold a conversation or kick a football. Planning the fishing trips, baking cakes, building dens. I understand that. Those things are exciting.<br />
<br />
Not me though. I've been feeling nostalgic about my baby growing up since before he was even born! I suppose I've worked with so many children, seen so many beautiful newborns grow into gorgeously cheeky toddlers and wonderful independent schoolchildren. Some of them are even young adults now, graduating from university and forging lives all of their own. I know just how quickly they grow, how short and precious those early days are.<br />
<br />
He's only 8 weeks old. But already he's growing out of clothes. He's learnt to roll over, to smile and giggle. He pulls a special face when he wants to make me laugh, sticks his tongue out at his daddy and grins when you lift him up to put him in the bath. He's so big and I already miss my little bundle.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-EgrTFZyGVMY/Vw__xv-0xpI/AAAAAAAAG2k/X38ABEeCVy4YcdBvi6bIO_Bl2omgNeQfACKgB/s1600/2016%2B-%2B3" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-EgrTFZyGVMY/Vw__xv-0xpI/AAAAAAAAG2k/X38ABEeCVy4YcdBvi6bIO_Bl2omgNeQfACKgB/s320/2016%2B-%2B3" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
I'm still excited to meet the toddler he will become, to find out what his interests will be, to read his favourite book 500 times a day (OK, maybe not that quite so much!) I want to take him to the zoo, go on picnics and bake a special cake together for daddy's birthday.<br />
<br />
Just, not quite yet.<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-47269493909818961582016-02-15T12:30:00.000+00:002016-02-15T12:30:07.919+00:00Top tips for eating out with ToddlersDo you take your toddler out to eat in public? Some parents seem to manage reasonably civilised meals while others spend the time trying to persuade a wayward child to sit down, stop shouting and please try just one mouthful! If you would like to enjoy the odd meal out, these tips may help.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQgVyJpDkWVWMyUMNl65_UAPUaBB77gfPRtkt8CmUvFqCNihPVGzrlP_81Q-W-YsSpPci3TFe0kKlqO8ICI5BddQfC2MCtz_K6CefL36_U-T33WBmRrPuFIJR2mILJG3QVEg3laN74vh0/s1600/eat+out.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQgVyJpDkWVWMyUMNl65_UAPUaBB77gfPRtkt8CmUvFqCNihPVGzrlP_81Q-W-YsSpPci3TFe0kKlqO8ICI5BddQfC2MCtz_K6CefL36_U-T33WBmRrPuFIJR2mILJG3QVEg3laN74vh0/s320/eat+out.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<h4>
1. Time the meal carefully</h4>
If your child normally eats at 12 then it would be wise to arrive at a restaurant at around that time, or even a little earlier. An over-hungry or tired child is unlikely to sit calmly and wait while your order is cooked, and if you keep them quiet with breadsticks or other snacks they may not eat when the food does arrive. It might also be worth considering places with a self serve salad bar or buffet since you wont have to wait.<br />
<br />
<h4>
2. Choose your table</h4>
Even if your are seated by a server you can always ask for a specific table, or a table in a particular area. A good choice might be near a window, where your toddler can watch passing traffic, or near the kitchen if you can watch the chef. At self serve places it's a good idea to sit near the buffet if you are on your own. That way you can fetch food much more easily.<br />
<br />
<h4>
3. Bring supplies</h4>
If your baby is still quite small it would be a good idea to bring a bib with you, and perhaps his usual cutlery and sippy cup as well. Older toddlers will enjoy using the adult versions of course. You might also want to bring some small, quiet toys to keep them occupied before or after eating. A toy car or two, some drawing paper or little toy animals can all be good options. Really you want things that engage your child's imagination so they can play independently for an unspecified length of time.<br />
<br />
<h4>
4. Be there with your child</h4>
It can be tempting to treat a meal out as an opportunity to chat with other adults and hope your toddler just sits quietly and lets you have some peace! While that is totally understandable, and you should be able to have some adult conversation, it rarely works well. Your child is a part of the group and she will respond much better if she feels included. Ask her what she would like to order (perhaps giving just two or three options) and include her in the conversation where you can. Then, while she is busy drawing a picture, you can grab a minute to chat to your friend. <br />
<br />
<h4>
5. Prepare at home</h4>
A child who has never learnt table manners at home wont suddenly behave differently when out and about. Expect your toddler to sit up at the table, use cutlery and eat a wide variety of foods everyday and those things wont come as a surprise. It's also a good idea to have a toddler sit at the table for a few minutes after they have finished eating, gradually lengthening that time. Again, if they are used to jumping down and running about the moment they have had the last bite then they will expect to do the same in a café. If your child is a <a href="http://orchardgreenparenting.blogspot.co.uk/2015/11/top-tips-for-parents-of-fussy-eaters.html" target="_blank">fussy eater then these tips</a> may help you avoid daily battles over a spoonful of peas.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-88263142128989574162016-01-21T12:06:00.000+00:002016-01-21T12:06:39.297+00:00Singing through the day Singing through the day<br />
<br />
Earlier today I was cutting a two year old's toe nails. I managed to do about four nails before he started squirming around so I made up a silly song. It made no sense, the lyrics were awful and they had the wrong rhythm for the tune (plus it was about cutting nails) but it kept him happy and still while I got the job done! Even if you think you have a terrible voice children love to hear you sing, and a few songs can be a wonderful tool to get you through the day.<br />
<br />
If you use specific songs at certain times of day, and avoid singing them at other times, your child will very quickly learn what the songs mean. I know several children who will automatically start to tidy up when they hear the "tidy up song", without being asked. I even know some toddlers who will sing the song to themselves and start tidying up - entirely unprompted! Using a song can take a boring chore and turn it into a game.<br />
<br />
Songs also have a limited length and let a child know that something won't last forever. Few toddlers enjoy having their face washed after a meal but singing "rub-a-dub" helps them to understand that the face washing will be over when the song is done. I have even known a child who hated having his face washed remind me to do it, because we had to sing the next part of the song!<br />
<br />
When you are singing you are engaging with your child, not just doing something to them. With all the stress of parenthood it can be easy to think of things like face washing and nappy changing as tasks to get done as quickly as possible and you can almost forget that you are caring for a small person! Singing reminds you to interact with your child and introduces a bit of fun, so you're not just restraining them while you clean up the mess.<br />
<br />
Finally, in order to sing you have to breathe. Singing can really help you to cope with a stressful situation, such as a crying baby. It may even calm the baby! Any song will do, a lullaby if you know one or just something you have heard on the radio. Making up your own songs can be fun as well, adapt words to suit and think up variations. Anything to distract both yourself and your baby. When you get into the habit of making up songs you will find you do so as you go round the supermarket or in the car, any situation where you need to distract or calm a child but can't pick them up and don't have toys to hand!<br />
<br />
Here are some songs I like to use:<br />
<br />
For hand and face washing before or after meals:<br />
<br />
Wash your dirty hands,<br />
Wash your dirty hands,<br />
Rub-a-dub and scrub-a-dub,<br />
And wash your dirty hands<br />
<br />
(repeat for face)<br />
<br />
To calm children down and get them sitting still:<br />
<br />
I have 10 wriggly fingers and they all belong to me,<br />
I can make them do things,<br />
Would you like to see?<br />
I can shut them up tight, and open them wide,<br />
I can put them all together, or make them all hide,<br />
I can jump them up high,<br />
I can jump them down low,<br />
I can fold them quietly,<br />
And sit just so<br />
<br />
Nappy changing:<br />
<br />
Oh, dear what can the matter be?<br />
We have to change your nappy,<br />
That will make you happy,<br />
Now that you're nice and clean.<br />
<br />
Doing up a baby grow after nappy changes!<br />
<br />
1 little, 2 little, 3 little poppers<br />
4 little, 5 little, 6 little poppers<br />
7 little, 8 little, 9 little poppers<br />
10 little poppers, let's do them all up<br />
<br />
Pop, pop, pop those poppers<br />
Pop, pop, pop those poppers<br />
Pop, pop, pop those poppers<br />
10 little poppers, are all done up.<br />
<br />
Tidy up time:<br />
<br />
Tidy up time, tidy up time<br />
Tidy up the toys, tidy up the toys<br />
Let's all be helpers, let's all be helpers<br />
Girls and boys, girls and boys<br />
<br />
Silly songs<br />
<br />
Here is an example of a song adapted one day when comforting baby triplets who were upset following their immunisations, their mum and I enjoyed taking turns to come up with new verses and the children enjoyed the singing.<br />
<br />
What shall we do with a grumpy baby?<br />
What shall we do with a grumpy baby?<br />
What shall we do with a grumpy baby?<br />
In the afternoon?<br />
<br />
Give her a kiss and a cuddle too...<br />
<br />
Pat her on the back and see if she burps...<br />
<br />
If she's hungry give her some milk...<br />
<br />
Take her out for a walk in her pram...<br />
<br />
Give her something fun to look at...<br />
<br />
Dance around the room and sing a song...<br />
<br />
Put her in bed so she'll have a sleep...Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-31088678547121935382015-12-07T08:30:00.000+00:002015-12-07T08:30:03.573+00:00Spirit of ChristmasWhether your family is religious or not it can be easy for Christmas to be all about the gifts a child will receive with little thought of anything else. Here are some great ideas to keep a spirit of family and sharing during the festive season.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIboPwk3xetWu2lB3DR7wyij025Z4AbXsEAdiPtwiC8PRe7mtHN3BfvaPhvsV-LAPZnl95oB9iVOMsTNIRvC4dqhO3tQmMAk7WMWZfQOcBiP7sRiQ7f3K4GPqEPYxVB4qDYqvxtFWwD_M/s1600/christmas.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIboPwk3xetWu2lB3DR7wyij025Z4AbXsEAdiPtwiC8PRe7mtHN3BfvaPhvsV-LAPZnl95oB9iVOMsTNIRvC4dqhO3tQmMAk7WMWZfQOcBiP7sRiQ7f3K4GPqEPYxVB4qDYqvxtFWwD_M/s320/christmas.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<h4>
Make a Christmas wish</h4>
If your little one writes a Christmas list or letter to Santa it is a good idea to remind them that they are asking for things or giving suggestions, there is no guarantee that they will be given everything on the list. A child who believes that you always get precisely what you ask for can be devastated if the toy sells out or an aunt sends the wrong colour, or when they ask for something they can't have such as a pony. A little one who is prepared to get something different is more likely to be pleased with whatever they find, avoiding any tantrums on Christmas day and encouraging them to feel grateful rather than entitled.<br />
<br />
One way to achieve this is to ask children to list more things than they will be given, for example a two or three year old might cut out pictures of three toys to stick to a letter for Santa. You would explain that Santa will only bring one big toy but he needs the child to give him some ideas, Santa might even think up something better!<br />
<br />
I also avoid asking children what they will be getting for Christmas, instead I ask what they are hoping to get, if I feel the need to mention it at all. A subtle difference but an important one. Even better, ask what they are most looking forward to or what their favourite bit of Christmas is!<br />
<br />
<h4>
Thank you cards</h4>
Children can have so many gifts to open that it is easy to forget where they all came from. Making or writing thank you cards is a lovely way to remind a little one that lots of people care for them, as well as encouraging good manners. A toddler might only be able to do three or four cards themselves but a combination of a photograph of them playing with the toy and a crayon scribble should get the message across. A nice creative activity for rainy days between Christmas and new year when all the usual outings are closed and everyone is stuck at home.<br />
<br />
<h4>
Give things away</h4>
A large number of new toys might mean that storage space is getting tight so Christmas can be an ideal time for a clear out. Either before or after Christmas encourage your child to find two or three toys which they don't play with any more and which someone else might enjoy. These can be taken to a charity shop or given to a women's refuge. In the run up to Christmas some charities also collect shoe boxes full of gifts to be sent overseas, collecting together all the objects is a lovely way for your little one to really think about what another child might like.<br />
<br />
<h4>
Make gifts</h4>
Grandparents and other relatives might treasure a gift made by your little one. That shapeless but colourful salt dough candle holder will still be gracing the side board when they are at university! Choosing one craft and spending an afternoon making enough for grandparents, uncles and aunts can be a lovely opportunity to think about giving as well as receiving, and great fun as well.<br />
<br />
<h4>
One special thing</h4>
Christmas can be all about the children but it is as good idea to remember every member of the family and let your child know that everyone is important. A nice way to do this is to ask each family member to choose one thing they would like to do over Christmas. It could be watching a particular film, going for a walk, playing a game together or just having a favourite food. Make sure each of these things happens.<br />
<br />
<h4>
New traditions</h4>
Every family has traditions at Christmas and this is one thing that really binds you together, Christmas anywhere else is never the same! If this is your first Christmas as a family you might like to discuss which traditions each parent wants to continue from their own childhood and perhaps introduce some new ones. It doesn't matter what they are, from crack of dawn stocking opening to singing carols by candle light or drinking hot chocolate at bedtime, try to keep it simple so that it doesn't add to the stress, then relax and enjoy your unique and special day together.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-64682016788071700032015-11-23T09:00:00.000+00:002015-11-23T09:00:08.122+00:00Nutrition for Toddlers<!-- Facebook Pixel Code -->
<script>
!function(f,b,e,v,n,t,s){if(f.fbq)return;n=f.fbq=function(){n.callMethod?
n.callMethod.apply(n,arguments):n.queue.push(arguments)};if(!f._fbq)f._fbq=n;
n.push=n;n.loaded=!0;n.version='2.0';n.queue=[];t=b.createElement(e);t.async=!0;
t.src=v;s=b.getElementsByTagName(e)[0];s.parentNode.insertBefore(t,s)}(window,
document,'script','//connect.facebook.net/en_US/fbevents.js');
fbq('init', '641563809280381');
fbq('track', "PageView");</script>
<noscript><img height="1" width="1" style="display:none"
src="https://www.facebook.com/tr?id=641563809280381&ev=PageView&noscript=1"
/></noscript>
<!-- End Facebook Pixel Code -->
Recently a few people have asked me about nutrition for toddlers, do they need different foods (or a different balance of foods) to adults? Obviously babies have all their needs met through breast milk or formula and during weaning they will have a combination of both. But what about toddlers and pre-schoolers, what do they need?<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivekxSQwsIsVMFxCL0EjjJoXhUEmBEMQgFovLrKd7jYPIiPIDdhuNF4OgFkhVhVyuJD0C01MdBlntRAeql54rS0U4rrhhAyRiPCgqFfrACM6r3MCmHtyFQkVabR4Fb3qKLPUKNLaFPRyo/s1600/Fotolia_61465558_Subscription_Monthly_M.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="250" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivekxSQwsIsVMFxCL0EjjJoXhUEmBEMQgFovLrKd7jYPIiPIDdhuNF4OgFkhVhVyuJD0C01MdBlntRAeql54rS0U4rrhhAyRiPCgqFfrACM6r3MCmHtyFQkVabR4Fb3qKLPUKNLaFPRyo/s320/Fotolia_61465558_Subscription_Monthly_M.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<h4>
Growth</h4>
Protein is especially important for children since it's needed for both physical and brain growth, so they need a bit more than most adults do. Meats provide a complete protein, but if your family avoids meat you will need to be sure to eat a wide variety of beans, pulses etc to get all the different amino acids needed for growth and repair. This is especially true during growth spurts.<br />
<br />
Calcium is important for growing strong and healthy bones, and for most families it is found in milk. A child under five needs about a pint of milk a day, but this includes milk in yoghurts, cheese, served on breakfast cereals, mashed into potatoes etc. so they may not need to drink very much at all. Because children need a full fat diet (see energy, below) this should be whole milk until they are at least two. If the child has a good diet they can have semi-skimmed milk after that but it would be preferable to keep to whole milk until they are five. Children who can't drink milk from cows/goats etc should be given breast milk or formula until they are two so that they don't miss out on any of those nutrients. After that there are many vegan sources of calcium, although it's a good idea to take a B12 supplement as well.<br />
<br />
<h4>
Energy</h4>
Children need a lot of calories for energy, both for growth and for all that running about. Most of that energy comes from carbohydrates and fat, if they don't get enough from those sources protein will be used for energy instead of growth. <br />
<br />
Children need a full fat diet, which means things like whole milk, full fat yoghurts, avocados, oily fish and oil used in normal cooking. It doesn't mean a lot of fried foods and those should be kept to a minimum. If you follow a low fat diet make sure that there are full fat options available for your toddler.<br />
<br />
Starchy carbohydrates are also important, things like bread, pasta and potatoes. Generally you don't want to offer these in overly large portions as a lot of children will fill up on them and not eat much of anything else. Follow the link to see what a portion size actually is, most parents are very surprised. It's a good idea to include wholegrain versions of these foods, but don't go overboard with fibre. Unlike adults children don't need much fibre and it can fill them up too much and stop them absorbing all the nutrients they need from their other foods. So go ahead and serve wholemeal bread or brown pasta, but keep the bran flakes for adults only.<br />
<br />
<h4>
Vitamins and Minerals</h4>
When talking about feeding children the mineral that always gets a mention is salt. The salt that naturally occurs in various foods is fine but avoid adding any salt during cooking or at the table. If adults like extra salt it would be better to add it away from the table so the child doesn't see, since they will inevitably want to copy. Avoid large quantities of high salt foods like bacon, cheese or gravy but a small amount wont do any harm.<br />
<br />
Other vitamins and minerals are found in fruit and vegetables and it is important to eat a wide variety of those since each one contains different nutrients. As a general guide you will get the widest variety if you eat fruits and vegetables of different colours so try to make sure that your "five a day" aren't all green! Since vitamins can easily be destroyed during cooking it is best to include some raw vegetables as well as the cooked ones. Things like carrot and cucumber sticks make ideal snacks.<br />
<br />
<h4>
What does that look like?</h4>
So, how does this all translate into an actual meal? Lets say you are making spaghetti bolognaise for your family. You might choose to use a mince that has a moderate fat content, perhaps 15%, and include several different vegetables in the sauce. You would serve your child a proportionally bigger helping of sauce compared to the amount of pasta they have and might put some cheese on the top. The meal would be followed by a full fat yoghurt and a piece of fruit.<br />
<br />
For information on what a portion size looks like <a href="http://www.infantandtoddlerforum.org/portion-sizes-table-2015" target="_blank">this table by the infant and toddler forum</a> is an excellent resource. Since all children are different I would consider these pictures to show a minimum amount, so long as your child eats this much there is no need to encourage them to have more. However some children are growing fast and have big appetites so it's much better to give them larger portions than to restrict their meals and end up giving less healthy snacks later on.<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-44923597862597326222015-11-23T07:40:00.000+00:002015-11-23T07:40:00.443+00:00Christmas Countdown CalendarI've been seeing a lot of advent calendars lately. The shops seem to be full of the sort that focus on giving children gifts, anything from a daily chocolate to lego figures. I have to admit, I don't like the way that "the magic of Christmas" seems to be translated into different ways to give children gifts. When I look back on my childhood Christmases I do remember getting gifts of course but I also remember things like making gifts for my grandpaerents, helping to decorate the tree or making paper chains. Surely those memories are more important than just getting lots of toys?<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-wjOlLYu1Zn8/Vk8gp8lqyXI/AAAAAAAAGpk/mGLsYnqKbGw/s1600/2015%2B-%2B1" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-wjOlLYu1Zn8/Vk8gp8lqyXI/AAAAAAAAGpk/mGLsYnqKbGw/s400/2015%2B-%2B1" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
My calendar is a little different. Each door opens to reveal an activity that will help you to create Christmas memories. Some are about having fun as a family, some encourage artistic skills or sensory exploration, some activities involve thinking of other people. They are all simple enough to do with a toddler, or can be made elaborate enough for an older child, shouldn't be too expensive and don't need you to be part of a large community. I haven't included activities like visiting Santa or decorating a tree, since I don't know when you might choose to do those and I have also avoided anything very religious, but you can add that in if it suits your family.<br />
<br />
You can also use the countdown in a few different ways, as a traditional calendar with doors to open each day, as a reference list on the wall without doors or even alongside an "elf on the shelf."<br />
<br />
I'm really excited about the calendar, I hope it will work for lots of different families and I'm looking forward to hearing about all the fun you have over on my <a href="http://www.facebook.com/orchardgreen" target="_blank">facebook page</a>!<br />
<br />
To get the printable downloads absolutely free, just fill in your details here and I will email them right to you, along with instructions for the different ways to use them.<br />
<br />
Have fun!<br />
<br />
<iframe frameborder="0" height="345" scrolling="no" src="https://madmimi.com/signups/173117/iframe" style="max-width: 400px; width: 100%;"></iframe>
<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-14799369279861358012015-11-16T10:38:00.002+00:002015-11-16T10:38:30.383+00:00Lunch box ideas for winter<!-- Facebook Pixel Code -->
<script>
!function(f,b,e,v,n,t,s){if(f.fbq)return;n=f.fbq=function(){n.callMethod?
n.callMethod.apply(n,arguments):n.queue.push(arguments)};if(!f._fbq)f._fbq=n;
n.push=n;n.loaded=!0;n.version='2.0';n.queue=[];t=b.createElement(e);t.async=!0;
t.src=v;s=b.getElementsByTagName(e)[0];s.parentNode.insertBefore(t,s)}(window,
document,'script','//connect.facebook.net/en_US/fbevents.js');
fbq('init', '641563809280381');
fbq('track', "PageView");</script>
<noscript><img height="1" width="1" style="display:none"
src="https://www.facebook.com/tr?id=641563809280381&ev=PageView&noscript=1"
/></noscript>
<!-- End Facebook Pixel Code -->
Summer lunch boxes are relatively easy. Whether it's for a picnic on the beach or lunch at school a quick sandwich, fruit and a yoghurt tend to be the go-to options and they cover the basics pretty well. As the year goes by you might find that cold food is less appealing, that tummies need something more substantial to fill them up, and that sandwiches have just got a bit boring! Here are some of my suggestions for lunch boxes in winter.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheMZvH8dx3xTtZ3vu2BtG2b_upMVUSNkrDrABNfdEpXILgQmDyHS_rOZmnrHZVwRpXIeXI7C2IFbYy2u-jtxExN9tAgEqd_NBh5-8vsU0nGeiHhKM8wn19_EM0ZGlnmEBEQZozPDevwOg/s1600/hot+lunch.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheMZvH8dx3xTtZ3vu2BtG2b_upMVUSNkrDrABNfdEpXILgQmDyHS_rOZmnrHZVwRpXIeXI7C2IFbYy2u-jtxExN9tAgEqd_NBh5-8vsU0nGeiHhKM8wn19_EM0ZGlnmEBEQZozPDevwOg/s320/hot+lunch.jpg" width="213" /></a></div>
<br />
<h4>
Safety Concerns</h4>
You know your child best so you should use your judgement when deciding if it is safe to send them to school with hot food. Can they open the container without spilling it? Will they test the food to be sure it isn't too hot before taking a big spoonful? If you have any doubts it may be better to stick to cold foods or a hot meal from the school canteen.<br />
<br />
For safety's sake you need the food to be piping hot when you pack it, and to do so as close to lunchtime as possible. If your food is very hot and put into a preheated flask you will have killed most of the bacteria before packing so there should only be a small risk and bacteria wont multiply if the food stays hot enough. You want to avoid a situation where food cools and is left warm, basically you don't want the temperature of food to drop below 60 C (140 F) for more than three hours. For that reason it's worth buying a good quality flask as they do vary in how long they keep things hot. Also be sure that the flask is the right size, food cools quickly in a half empty flask.<br />
<br />
My personal preference is to avoid putting hot meat or rice dishes in lunch boxes unless I know they will be eaten within a few hours, since those are the most likely things to cause problems.<br />
<br />
<h4>
Soups</h4>
An obvious hot lunch is soup, and it's pretty easy to open a tin (or defrost some home made soup) and heat it up while everyone eats breakfast. Pop it in a flask and it's ready to go. You can either provide a cup to drink the soup from or a bowl and spoon. A vegetable soup could take the place of fruit in a typical lunch, if you choose a lentil or bean version it will be extra filling and provide protein as well.<br />
<br />
<h4>
Pasta </h4>
Pasta is another great option, especially if you have a wide mouthed food flask. Some are even designed to include a spoon and you can eat straight out of them, which saves on washing up! A tomato and vegetable pasta will keep well, just slightly undercook it and make the sauce extra runny since it will continue to cook and absorb water while in the flask. You could provide a little packet of grated cheese to sprinkle over the top and your pasta dish will be almost a complete meal. Recently I was packing soup for a toddler but I wasn't sure that he would be able eat it without spilling, and I wanted to bulk it out a bit. I cooked a handful of pasta in the soup before popping it in a flask and it worked perfectly, "soup pasta" has been requested several times since!<br />
<br />
<h4>
Stews</h4>
If you have some leftover stew (or tagine etc) from a previous meal then this will fit beautifully into your food flask. If you prefer not to heat a meat stew you can include some chopped cold meat to be added to vegetable stew just before eating.<br />
<br />
<h4>
Mince dishes</h4>
Things like cottage pie, spaghetti bolognaise or chilli are easy to fit into a flask. Since they fill up the whole space they stay nice and hot. Older children might enjoy an "assemble your own" meal with hot filling for them to add to tacos or wraps.<br />
<br />
<h4>
Chinese and Indian foods</h4>
Leftover stir fry, noodles, egg fried rice, korma etc are nice and easy to pack. Again, the rice and sauce fill up the whole space in a flask and few air spaces means food stays warm for longer. You could provide some naan bread, poppadums or prawn crackers to eat with it.<br />
<br />
<h4>
Finger foods</h4>
These don't stay warm quite so well since there tends to be a lot of air space in the flask, and some things may also go a little bit soggy. Still, they can be good options for a bit of a change when they wont be kept for too long before eating. Of course, you may also need to cut up foods to fit in your flask. Some ideas would include:<br />
<ul>
<li>Chicken or vegetable nuggets</li>
<li>Sausages</li>
<li>Hotdogs (include a roll separately)</li>
<li>Pizza</li>
<li>Toasted sandwich</li>
<li>Fish fingers</li>
<li>Pasties or pies</li>
<li>Spring rolls</li>
<li>Samosas</li>
<li>Breaded mozzarella sticks</li>
</ul>
<br />
<h4>
</h4>
<br />
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-28509226549318559532015-11-02T17:58:00.001+00:002015-11-13T11:36:00.277+00:00Top Tips for Parents of Fussy Eaters<!-- Facebook Pixel Code -->
<script>
!function(f,b,e,v,n,t,s){if(f.fbq)return;n=f.fbq=function(){n.callMethod?
n.callMethod.apply(n,arguments):n.queue.push(arguments)};if(!f._fbq)f._fbq=n;
n.push=n;n.loaded=!0;n.version='2.0';n.queue=[];t=b.createElement(e);t.async=!0;
t.src=v;s=b.getElementsByTagName(e)[0];s.parentNode.insertBefore(t,s)}(window,
document,'script','//connect.facebook.net/en_US/fbevents.js');
fbq('init', '641563809280381');
fbq('track', "PageView");</script>
<noscript><img height="1" width="1" style="display:none"
src="https://www.facebook.com/tr?id=641563809280381&ev=PageView&noscript=1"
/></noscript>
<!-- End Facebook Pixel Code -->
It's so difficult when a child doesn't eat as well as you would like them too. You have this picture of a family sitting down to eat together, children happily munching the vegetables you have lovingly prepared to nourish their little bodies. Instead you feel like you are entering a battle ground, frustration mounting as you try to persuade them to eat just one pea. Good food is so important, you feel like a failure for not getting it into them and try convince yourself it isn't personal with every wasted dinner that goes straight into the bin.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcUMhe86UsygIGsZtnBeEKgne-q0y75Mj5rUR2ad94bjNfBsx8UdxEQE_W4XT2wnq4sbC474W1lpcrDIhUb1tQAl5KmwbHpguYQLNieQvPEzaAYBWgXWN_LrB5DIHuDis9hPfUvnnR1Vw/s1600/Fotolia_58902352_Subscription_Monthly_M.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcUMhe86UsygIGsZtnBeEKgne-q0y75Mj5rUR2ad94bjNfBsx8UdxEQE_W4XT2wnq4sbC474W1lpcrDIhUb1tQAl5KmwbHpguYQLNieQvPEzaAYBWgXWN_LrB5DIHuDis9hPfUvnnR1Vw/s320/Fotolia_58902352_Subscription_Monthly_M.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
Luckily there are some things that can help, and they may well be things you have never tried! With just a few changes I have helped many fussy eaters to become keen eaters, one parent even joked that I must have used hypnosis! Here are my top tips for peaceful mealtimes.<br />
<br />
<h4>
1.</h4>
Serve a small amount of food. It's easy for a little one to be put off by a big plate of food, and if they do finish a smaller portion they can always have seconds! Serving a small amount also lets your fussy eater have the satisfaction of telling you they ate it all up, which will motivate them for next time.<br />
<br />
<h4>
2.</h4>
Cut the food into little pieces. Many fussy eaters don't like to have their mouth too full, cutting the food into smaller pieces than usual lets them eat more comfortably.<br />
<br />
<h4>
3.</h4>
Have family mealtimes. If at all possible sit down and eat together, all eating the same foods. Children learn from your example and will want to eat whatever they see you enjoying.<br />
<br />
<h4>
4.</h4>
Avoid distractions. Turn off the TV, put toys away and sit together at the table. Children need to engage with the food in front of them, which they can't do if Mum pops a spoonful in while the child is absorbed in postman pat.<br />
<br />
<h4>
5.</h4>
Have real conversations. Avoid talking about eating, who has eaten most or begging your child to eat. You might mention how nice the food is, or that carrots are your favourite, but keep it brief before moving on to other topics.<br />
<br />
<h4>
6.</h4>
Take the pressure off. Try not to spend mealtimes watching your fussy eater, instead turn your attention to other family members. Even praise can be off putting if it's over done so try not to applaud wildly at the first bite. Instead wait until your child has had a few bites, or towards the end of the meal, then smile warmly and say well done.<br />
<br />
<h4>
7.</h4>
Remember, your job is to provide a variety of healthy food on a regular basis. Your child's job is to eat, or not, as they choose. You haven't failed if they didn't eat much, just keep offering lots of healthy foods and you will get there in the end!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-91352483700937612322015-10-26T12:02:00.000+00:002015-10-26T12:02:38.091+00:00Why Dad isn't helping Mum at allIt's something you hear all the time:<br />
<ul>
<li>Mums chatting about how great their partners are for helping with the baby.</li>
<li>A Dad giving his wife a break by taking the children out on a Saturday morning.</li>
<li>The Dad at a playgroup being told that he's an amazing father for taking the toddler out while Mum's on maternity leave.</li>
<li>Baby clothes with "instructions for Dad"</li>
<li>Mum writing a how to list before leaving Dad in charge for the day.</li>
</ul>
A lot of Dads do spend more time with their children these days, and that is fantastic for the children, for the father, and yes for the mother as well. But they are not "helping out", nor are they "babysitting". <br />
<br />
To say Dads are helping means that caring for children is the Mum's job, it's her responsibility and by default she would do it 100% of the time. The Dad is reduced to the role of second, helping out now and again if given clear instructions but always with Mum a phonecall away should he be unable to cope. That is not fair on Mums, who shouldn't be expected to do it all, but even more so it is unfair on Dads.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTNFpHvgFd-5vTI7Hk0lbv7e5yLlkgS6gn-wgL7n4R-lai1Qa2cik7emGumdLOO434NPsWZp-PIwK_Pwh84XDl7TO_D5x7U1uYQxiQ6xlireprQq8Rx7sUOnCN2b14kyHE6dcOzIpvwMA/s1600/Daddy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="201" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTNFpHvgFd-5vTI7Hk0lbv7e5yLlkgS6gn-wgL7n4R-lai1Qa2cik7emGumdLOO434NPsWZp-PIwK_Pwh84XDl7TO_D5x7U1uYQxiQ6xlireprQq8Rx7sUOnCN2b14kyHE6dcOzIpvwMA/s320/Daddy.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
The thing is, men are just as capable as women. Dads can look after babies and children just as well as Mums can, sometimes better. But society teaches them not to, we collectively train men to feel that they can't do a good job and then complain if they feel that perhaps they should just let Mum (the "expert") get on with it. <br />
<br />
Just think about those early days with a newborn. Mum has time off work and plenty of people to turn to if she needs help learning those new skills. Dad, on the other hand, has just a few days at home. Before you know it Mum has perfected the art of nappy changing, burping and settling to sleep. So when Dad comes home and fumbles a little bit of course he turns to Mum for advice. And there you have it, the pattern has been set. Mum knows the perfect way to calm a crying baby and Dad doesn't. <br />
<br />
Of course it wouldn't be an issue if we didn't encourage everyone to continue on that path. Dad can learn to change a nappy and burp a baby, he could be the expert at bathing the toddler or the only one who knows the best local walks. But currently a Dad seems to be fighting against stereotypes when he takes an equal role. Even when people intend to be encouraging and supportive they damn by over praise, becoming patronising as they express surprise at his ability to handle bedtime or provide a healthy meal.<br />
<br />
Parents are parents, male or female, biological or adoptive, single or in partnership. We are all doing the same job, we all have strengths and weaknesses. Let's just support each other instead of assuming that some are the real parents while others are only helpers.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-31108005133004333042015-10-19T13:37:00.000+01:002015-10-19T13:37:00.300+01:00The good and the bad of playdoughI love playdough, it's such a great way to engage children. It's sensory, with all the different colours, scents and textures, it lets them use their imaginations, it helps develop fine motor skills and it's suitable for all ages. Really, why wouldn't you like it? <br />
<br />
The problem is, I often see playdough being advertised or used in ways that just don't make use of it's full potential. Usually each child will be given a very small amount of dough with a rolling pin and some cookie cutters, or perhaps a gadget that produces one specific shape. They might be given a few colours and told not to mix them. This sort of play can be fun, and most children will enjoy it for a short while, I'm not against the idea as such. But it really does miss the point of this fantastic play material, and so many opportunities are missed along the way. Read on to hear how I prefer to use playdough.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheQTsSYi5Rl6iDa3_dLW8GofvZtD6S56suvF_pKCDyo92nA2XHLRtE1_TOGGTsTS0fO6L_8gbaYIkr1vc2wr5f_15-7xP7AryCfun9835u6zCMKm-UD9w_0PqM1wg8sbbKtGwmq7Lj83U/s1600/playdough.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheQTsSYi5Rl6iDa3_dLW8GofvZtD6S56suvF_pKCDyo92nA2XHLRtE1_TOGGTsTS0fO6L_8gbaYIkr1vc2wr5f_15-7xP7AryCfun9835u6zCMKm-UD9w_0PqM1wg8sbbKtGwmq7Lj83U/s320/playdough.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<h4>
Homemade Dough</h4>
Personally I hate the plasticy smell of bought playdough, which makes me rather biased! Even if you like it though, do consider making your own from time to time (there's a recipe at the bottom of this post). Homemade dough is far cheaper than bought and comes in much bigger quantities, which opens up a whole range of possible play ideas. It can also be varied to give different types of sensory experiences:<br />
<ul>
<li>Cooked dough is warm when freshly made, and cool after storage</li>
<li>It can be any colour, vibrant or pastel, and contain glitter or other sparkles.</li>
<li>Dough can be scented in many ways, from fun doughs made with jelly/jello, to those that echo a season or activity like Christmas spices or hot chocolate, through to calming doughs scented with lavender.</li>
<li>You can also change the texture of playdough by trying out different recipes or including things like dried herbs and flowers.</li>
</ul>
<h4>
Loose Parts</h4>
With a small quantity of dough there is often only enough to roll out and squeeze on a cutter. Now that you have a huge blob of it you can do so much more! Instead of dictating the sorts of things that should be done, aim to spark your child's imagination and let them follow their own ideas by providing them with different loose parts. They will develop confidence, the ability to concentrate, problem solving skills and so much more when they are allowed to play independently, with no "right" thing to do or make.<br />
Ideas for loose parts include:<br />
<ul>
<li>Drinking straws, either whole or cut into short lengths</li>
<li>Cupcake cases</li>
<li>Large buttons</li>
<li>Short lengths of ribbon</li>
<li>Small twigs and sticks</li>
<li>Acorns, Pinecones</li>
<li>Leaves </li>
<li>Tools for cutting or shaping</li>
<li>Arms and legs from a "Potato head" toy</li>
<li>toy people or animals</li>
<li>dried pasta shapes</li>
</ul>
Use your imagination and see what you can come up with, but don't put out everything at once. If you choose a small number of items each time you will be able to create a completely different play experience.<br />
<br />
<h4>
Sit back and watch what happens!</h4>
You may have had something in mind, but your child may have a completely different idea and that's absolutely fine. A few toy animals might make footprints in the dough, or be tucked up under a doughy blanket, or perhaps they all need new hats! Whatever your child chooses to do they are developing so many skills as they think through their plans, and you might be surprised by how long they stay absorbed in the activity.<br />
<br />
<h4>
A recipe for playdough</h4>
This is my favourite recipe, it is quick and easy but gives a good textured dough that lasts very well in an airtight container or ziplock bag. You do need to use the cream of tartar or it will leave a salty residue on your hands, I buy mine in bulk from Amazon and find that a bag lasts years.<br />
<br />
The recipe makes enough dough for one or two children.<br />
<br />
First measure the following into a large bowl (children love to help with this bit!)<br />
<ul>
<li>2 cups of plain flour</li>
<li>1/2 cup of salt</li>
<li>2 tablespoons of vegetable oil</li>
<li>2 1/2 tablespoons of cream of tartar</li>
<li>glitter (if using)</li>
<li>a few drops of essential oil or flavouring essence/extract for scent (if using)</li>
</ul>
Next put some food colouring in a jug and measure in 1 1/2 cups of freshly boiled water. quickly mix the colour into the water and add to the other ingredients.<br />
<br />
Use a spoon to mix everything together (it will seem very sticky at first but that should go) and as soon as it is cool enough turn out and knead. You should very quickly get a lovely soft dough which you can give to your child as soon as it stops being hot. Any scents you have added will be stronger while the dough is warm and it really is a treat. I still remember my Mum making a cooked playdough and letting us play with it warm from the saucepan!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-69824872042258034092015-10-12T14:43:00.000+01:002015-10-12T14:43:00.574+01:00Potty Training part 2 - nappy freeYour toddler shows all the signs of being ready to potty train and you have been preparing them for a few weeks. Now is the time to say goodbye to nappies!<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjG6cy5MRO6kPfpE3r2cDBKAMGj9dB9sezGOcBEpgGPiumj6G6LBRcRQQDZBu1bK09RTskmSi-7An6QswAljfHso0a1VhGL6U9a13HzKJHlXuhF2JAU6uGtCgY-mHuVn06NWc538ropYPc/s1600/potty.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjG6cy5MRO6kPfpE3r2cDBKAMGj9dB9sezGOcBEpgGPiumj6G6LBRcRQQDZBu1bK09RTskmSi-7An6QswAljfHso0a1VhGL6U9a13HzKJHlXuhF2JAU6uGtCgY-mHuVn06NWc538ropYPc/s320/potty.jpg" width="220" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<h4>
Choose your day</h4>
Some children will simply announce that they don't want to wear nappies anymore, often at the least convenient moment! If you are choosing the day yourself, however, there are some things you will want to bear in mind. Choose a day when you will be at home with very little else going on, if you have any other children you may want to pick a time when they will be out of the house so that you can concentrate on your toddler. It is also best to avoid potty training when there are other changes in your little one's life - avoid holidays, and leave it at least a month either side (preferably two or three) of house moves and bigger changes.<br />
<br />
A few days before you start it is a good idea to take your toddler on a special shopping trip to buy pants and a potty, step stool or toilet seat. Explain to them that they are a big boy or girl now and very soon they will wear the pants and use the new potty, more about that in <a href="http://orchardgreenparenting.blogspot.co.uk/2015/10/potty-training-part-1-before-you-start.html" target="_blank">part 1</a><br />
<br />
<h4>
First things first</h4>
It may seem obvious but the first step on potty training day is to take the nappies away. When your toddler gets dressed let them choose a pair of pants to wear and remind them that they will be using the potty today. Even if they have several accidents you need to avoid putting your little one back in nappies or nappy substitutes such as pull ups, except for situations like long car journeys. The exception is when you realise that your child really isn't ready and you are going to go back to nappies for several months. Swapping and changing more frequently can confuse a toddler. You don't want to suggest there is any choice or decision about whether or not they wear nappies, it's pants all the time when awake.<br />
<br />
<h4>
Accidents</h4>
During the day you will probably find that your toddler will have some accidents. When that happens try not to show any disgust or displeasure, just say something like "Oops, did you forget to go to the potty?" and take them to sit on the potty anyway. Even if they just sit there you are reinforcing the idea that this is what they should do. Then involve your toddler in taking her wet clothes to the washing machine, finding dry clothes to put on, helping with any other clearing up and washing her hands.<br />
<br />
<h4>
Rewards</h4>
When you do have a success you will want to reward your toddler. Depending on your child then your approval, a hug and a well done may be all that is needed. More tangible rewards are often not needed. If you do feel that you need something more then a sticker or a special <a href="http://orchardgreenparenting.blogspot.co.uk/2015/07/why-star-charts-dont-always-work.html" target="_blank">reward chart</a> may do the job.<br />
<br />
A lot of people use a small sweet such as a chocolate button or jelly tot. They are small enough that you can give quite a few over the day without over doing it. You should only need to give those sorts of rewards for a week or two before they are no longer needed, after a while start to "forget" to give it, or switch to offering one at the end of an accident free day. <br />
<br />
Another reward for day one is to let your child phone someone special, such as a Grandparent, to tell them how well they have done. Make sure the recipient of the phone call has been primed so they can be suitably enthusiastic, and ask them not to quiz your toddler on how many accidents they had. The point is that they tried!<br />
<br />
<h4>
At the end of the day</h4>
At bedtime, praise your little one for trying very hard and for the successes they have had during the day, without mentioning any accidents. Ask them to choose a pair of pants to wear tomorrow and lay them out ready. You will also need to explain that even big children sometimes wear nappies at night because you can't go to the potty when you are sleeping. Reassure your toddler that he is still a big boy and will wear pants again in the morning.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-44879723577189830582015-10-05T13:40:00.000+01:002015-10-05T13:40:00.108+01:00Potty Training part 1- before you startYou have been changing nappies for quite long enough, your tiny baby has grown into a surprisingly big toddler and you think she is ready to be potty trained. Here are some things you might like to do before you take the nappies away, since its so much easier for your toddler to learn one thing at a time!<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieRxB7H58eF-nCfMNUBAfK5xhHV7sI0kezjR0lOCe1BIW6JpCppHj0lhYc-zvgG_5pDq7DZ2O3iDve6NXPdUW7ebyhuiJQJuAmBpSZNHW8CJj6MLYnJuuWofi4hyphenhyphenlL3RL_taO3NP5UotE/s1600/nappies.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieRxB7H58eF-nCfMNUBAfK5xhHV7sI0kezjR0lOCe1BIW6JpCppHj0lhYc-zvgG_5pDq7DZ2O3iDve6NXPdUW7ebyhuiJQJuAmBpSZNHW8CJj6MLYnJuuWofi4hyphenhyphenlL3RL_taO3NP5UotE/s320/nappies.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<h4>
Think about clothes</h4>
Children can have accidents while standing next to the potty, simply because they couldn't get their clothes off. When you take away nappies you will probably need to change your child's clothes, getting rid of vests with poppers, tights, dungarees and jeans in favour of short skirts or loose trousers with elasticated waists. It helps to get your little one used to the new clothes now and practice pulling trousers up and down. Show her how to do this and ask her to help when he gets dressed and at each nappy change.<br />
<br />
<h4>
Talk about the loo</h4>
Many children who are ready to be potty trained will be very interested in the loo. As embarrassing as this might be, it is a good sign. Let them come with you when you go to the loo, talk about what you are doing, "Now I need to pull up my trousers, then I can wash my hands." You can even show them how to tear off a sheet of loo roll and have them pass it to you. All this interest is just your child's way of learning, so help them to learn.<br />
<br />
You might also like to get some books about potty training. There are many books written about characters who use the potty and these can be great. I would also include books like "Aliens Love Underpants!" by Claire Freedman and Ben Cort or "Everybody Poos" by<br />
Taro Gomi. A bit of humour is always a good thing!<br />
<br />
<h4>
Watch your child</h4>
As you are playing together, keep an eye on your little one. You might notice that he goes quiet, sits very still or shows some other sign just before you have to change his nappy. Next time you see that behaviour you can make a comment like "are you doing a poo now? We will need to change your nappy won't we." This way you can draw your child's attention to the feeling of doing a poo (as opposed to the feeling of having a dirty nappy) and give them the words to express it. Be sure to smile, though, even if you don't really want to wipe another dirty bottom!<br />
<br />
<h4>
Watch your language</h4>
Do you hate changing dirty nappies? I doubt anyone would list it as a favourite part of the day, but do make sure that you don't let your child know it. If you have said things like "Urgh, what a horrid smelly poo!" or "phew, just wee, that's good!" then now is a good time to change that. Make sure your little one knows that everyone does poos, and that you are pleased when they do since it shows that their body is working. You don't want them to feel that doing a poo would upset you, or that it's preferable to avoid it!<br />
<br />
<h4>
Go shopping</h4>
Just a few days before you start potty training go on a special shopping trip. Make this a special outing, one to one if possible, and have fun! It's all part of building the excitement for this new stage.<br />
<br />
I must admit, I really don't like pull-ups. Children don't really notice the difference between these and nappies so they don't have much motivation to use the potty. There is also a danger that you might not notice when your little one has an accident and you want to notice straight away so that you can remind them to use the potty. I suggest you take your child to the shops so she can choose her new "big girl pants" for herself. Look at all the options and let her choose whichever ones she wants. You want her to be proud of her pants and enjoy wearing them.<br />
<br />
You can buy a potty at the same time, in her choice of colour and style. When choosing, do consider stability and how easy it is to clean. I have found that potties that convert into steps or collapse for transport can come apart in use. While those that have cushioned seats, removable seats for the big toilet, musical parts etc can be difficult to clean as there are lots of little nooks and crannies. My own preference is a simple potty made of one piece of smooth plastic, which can even be washed at high temperatures in the (otherwise empty!) dishwasher. That also happens to be the cheapest option!<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-70276575770673173492015-09-28T15:26:00.000+01:002015-09-28T15:26:06.442+01:00Ten Essential Baby BuysIf you are expecting your first baby it can be very difficult to know what you need to buy, and what you don't! Here are the ten things I think you really do need.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8Fnj8zevc_xao7eNKOHaI_P3iRnebABcWV413yGmxl8GyZMIac8MnniwODOXDL6wAVc7KlwckOCj4hTf5TODomgwyggm7hghkE4dG17hMdiVMdCfCLFaGdbImycpGh4x9-Ja2vODiSto/s1600/shopping.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8Fnj8zevc_xao7eNKOHaI_P3iRnebABcWV413yGmxl8GyZMIac8MnniwODOXDL6wAVc7KlwckOCj4hTf5TODomgwyggm7hghkE4dG17hMdiVMdCfCLFaGdbImycpGh4x9-Ja2vODiSto/s320/shopping.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
Don’t forget that there is nothing wrong with second hand items, provided you check for cleanliness, wear and tear. The exceptions to this are your car seat and mattress, both of which must be new. If at all possible all of your baby’s sheets, blankets and clothes should be 100% cotton, with some woollen hats and cardigans in winter. Natural fibres are more comfortable than synthetic, and cotton can be washed at high temperatures if necessary.<br />
<br />
<h4>
1) A newborn car seat.</h4>
This is something you will want to have well in advance since you can't leave hospital without it. Ask the shop staff to make sure it fits your car and show you how to fit it yourself. You might like to practice that one, it's rather embarrassing if your homecoming is delayed because you can't strap the baby into the car!<br />
<br />
<h4>
2) A Moses basket, crib, co-sleeper or cot. </h4>
You can use a cot from day one, but most people like to use a basket as well. Don't forget that you will need sheets and blankets too, go for cotton jersey fitted sheets and waffle weave blankets. If you plan to have baby in your bed at night do consider whether you will want somewhere for them to have daytime naps (bouncy chairs and swings are not safe for sleeping), and make sure you <a href="http://orchardgreenparenting.blogspot.co.uk/2015/04/making-bedsharing-safe.html" target="_blank">prepare your bed for safe bedsharing</a>.<br />
<br />
<h4>
3) Swaddles </h4>
Get proper swaddles, shaped jersey wraps that do up with velcro. They are much easier to use and are also much safer than a large muslin or simple blanket. Jersey (t-shirt fabric) may look thin but it is the best thing to use since you can always put a blanket over the top when it's chilly, and then take the blanket off if the baby gets too warm. Newborn babies really do sleep far better if they are swaddled, and you will want him to sleep well between feeds!<br />
<br />
<h4>
4) Muslins. </h4>
No matter how many you get, you will still manage to run out at some point. Muslins are great for so many things, catching dribbles during feeds, protecting your clothes from vomit, spreading over a changing mat, making an impromptu sun shade, the sky's the limit!<br />
<br />
<h4>
5) A dim light </h4>
You will need one for your baby’s room, and another for the room your baby will have night feeds in, if that's different. It could be a dimmer switch on the main light, a dim bulb in the lamp or a night light. You want to avoid bright lights at bedtime and for night feeds.<br />
<br />
<h4>
6) Nappies.</h4>
You will be needing a lot of nappies (washable or disposable), and cotton wool, nappy sacks, a changing mat and possibly a nappy bin. If you want to use baby wipes with a newborn I recommend waterwipes as they are the closest thing to water (you can get them from Amazon or Ocado.)<br />
<br />
<h4>
7) Clothes </h4>
Your baby will need something to wear but clothes are often given as gifts so stick with the basics to start with or you may end up with far too many. I would get short sleeved vests, babygrows, and two or three cardigans. You may also want some hats and mittens but do remember that your baby shouldn't be wearing a hat indoors. You will need some socks or booties if the babygrows don't have feet.<br />
<br />
<h4>
8) Transport</h4>
If you want to wear your baby then I suggest you go to your nearest sling library, where you will get lots of friendly advice and the chance to try out different types of sling before you decide to buy.<br />
<br />
If you want to use a pram look for one which allows the baby to lie completely flat on a mattress. I like the old fashioned style since you can see the baby but any pram where they lie flat on a firm mattress is fine. Avoid using a car seat or other shaped surface on a pram base, except very briefly. Do get the sun shade and rain cover now, you will need them both eventually!<br />
<br />
<h4>
9) A soft play mat with hanging toys</h4>
The kind that include a variety of toys such as mirrors, bells etc. are the most interesting. Even a very young baby will enjoy watching the toys swinging and it gives you a safe place to put them down when you need your hands for another job.<br />
<br />
<h4>
10) Some quick and easy adult food. </h4>
Make your life as easy as possible and stock up on things you can cook almost without thinking. You may want to have some nice biscuits on hand to offer visitors as well, but don't feel you have to play hostess. This is one time you really can point guests towards the kitchen and ask them to put the kettle on!<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-80163631078835299262015-09-14T13:49:00.000+01:002015-09-14T13:56:10.506+01:00What is Montessori?<br />
<br />
You might have come across a Montessori nursery in your area or have heard something about the method, but do you understand it?<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-jXVUPmCOSXE/VfbDtpNR-YI/AAAAAAAAGis/zqgzlYoGX3U/s1600/15%2B-%2B1" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-jXVUPmCOSXE/VfbDtpNR-YI/AAAAAAAAGis/zqgzlYoGX3U/s320/15%2B-%2B1" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<h4>
Where did the method come from?</h4>
<br />
Maria Montessori was born in 1870 and was the first woman to graduate from the University of Rome medical school. Dr Montessori applied her scientific background to the education of small children, watching how children learn and develop. Over time she tried many different activities, distilling her ideas down to those which really interested children, providing them with the opportunities they needed to learn and discarding anything the children didn't enjoy or which didn't get the results she was looking for. Such a child-focused method of learning proved to be highly effective and Dr Montessori travelled the world to establish schools where children would be happily motivated and exited to learn.<br />
<br />
<br />
<h4>
I've heard that the children just do what they want all day, it sounds nice but won't my son be behind when he starts school?</h4>
<br />
In a Montessori nursery children do have more freedom than they might have in other settings, but that doesn't mean they aren't learning.<br />
<br />
A teacher will keep an eye on each child, being aware of which activities the child is doing, guiding them towards a balanced curriculum and introducing new activities to stretch the child as they develop. Because this is done on an individual basis it is much easier to meet the needs of each child, the teacher isn't running group activities all day so has more time to challenge an able pupil or help one who is struggling.<br />
<br />
A Montessori education is very much about discovery, the child finds things out for herself by engaging in activities, or "learning by doing". This means she gains not only knowledge of facts but an understanding of what they really mean. It's great fun so the child is also encouraged to be enthusiastic about learning and to develop an enquiring mind, the knowledge of how to learn. Far from being "behind" when starting school, many children from Montessori nurseries are more advanced than their peers.<br />
<br />
<br />
<h4>
I went to visit a Montessori nursery and it was very quiet, I'm worried that the children are too tightly controlled.</h4>
<br />
In a standard nursery you would expect to see the adults running activities for groups of children. Some children might be playing, probably with toys you are familiar with, all shouting and laughing or arguing over who has the red brick. There will be a lot of noise as everyone tries to make themselves heard. All of this will be different in a Montessori nursery.<br />
<br />
There you might see an adult running a group activity but most of the children, most of the time, will be happily occupied alone or with a friend. The children are playing (it is called "working" to show respect for the child's learning) with toys that you don't recognise, those activities that were so carefully developed by Dr Montessori. Each child is absolutely absorbed in what they are doing, concentrating so hard on making a new discovery or practicing a skill that they seem quiet. Some of the adults will be showing children new activities, but as they are working one to one they do not have to raise their voices to be heard.<br />
<br />
It seems quiet because everyone is busy, children have the freedom to get their own snack when they are ready and relish being given responsibility for mopping spilt paint or putting things away when they are done. The children will go outside to run about and shout, they have not been forced to be artificially still, they are just too busy and having too much fun to want to be disruptive!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-25020119075418579282015-09-01T13:45:00.001+01:002015-09-01T13:46:19.526+01:00Your family is unique!Not all families are the same. This shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone of course, and yet we often assume that everybody is the same! You find people telling you that "toddlers don't like fish", "breastfeeding mums can't eat cabbage", or "the only way to get a good night's sleep is to bed share." Of course these things were probably true for the person saying it, perhaps even for their friends as well, but that doesn't make it true for every child and it doesn't make it true for you.<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Z8Q6UcxSF9E/VeWc899gpEI/AAAAAAAAGco/xJAniBxhG2g/s1600/15%2B-%2B1" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Z8Q6UcxSF9E/VeWc899gpEI/AAAAAAAAGco/xJAniBxhG2g/s320/15%2B-%2B1" width="320" /></a></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
My husband and I are expecting our first baby and last weekend we were talking about prams. Now as it happens I already have a pram. When I trained we used beautiful old coach built prams and many years ago (before I even met my husband) I bought one to restore and eventually use. So, the question is, do we need a modern pram?</div>
<div>
<br />
It would be less work than restoring the vintage model, but more expensive. Smaller to navigate round shops, but with less room for an older baby to lie flat and sleep. When you take away any desire to have the latest thing just because everyone else does, well they are actually pretty even.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
In the end it just comes down to what suits us, and our unique family. For someone who followed all the latest fashions, lived up a flight of stairs in a London town house and had to get on and off buses all the time, the modern pram would be the obvious choice. For a family who lived on a farm, had lots of time and skills for DIY and owned a car with a huge boot the vintage pram might be the clear winner. We haven't decided yet, but whatever we go for we will have considered it and not just followed the crowd.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
That's what I want for you. You shouldn't feel that you have to do what "everyone else" is doing. You shouldn't feel that if half your friends bed share and the other half use cry it out then those are your only options, or that your goal of combined feeding is impossible. I don't tell you what your goals should be, or insist that you use a particular method to reach those goals. I help you to work out what's right for you. Because your family is unique and what other people do doesn't matter.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Perhaps you choose to wear your baby and don't need a pram at all!</div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-56837304355519771722015-08-24T14:19:00.000+01:002015-08-24T14:19:49.740+01:00Can I breastfeed if I'm ill?Breastfeeding mums often ask me what will happen if they get ill, might breastmilk make the baby poorly? Would it be "good enough" if mum is run down? Would breastfeeding slow mum's recovery? The short answer is that for the majority of people, it is perfectly safe to continue feeding during most illnesses, with only a very few exceptions.<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNaZ7eSyoYd876mIx2XQZLjTADqZaOBa4sEFr2zx61kon5gURhgsacVuM9mwJ7gL02ydV0_3gJT80gv9aAE0bDAaDm9_v6rZ09ehELpnX32CvWg4GParLF_dcQMs4ev4pKBMnVHeUjZ6A/s1600/Fotolia_62979459_Subscription_Monthly_M.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNaZ7eSyoYd876mIx2XQZLjTADqZaOBa4sEFr2zx61kon5gURhgsacVuM9mwJ7gL02ydV0_3gJT80gv9aAE0bDAaDm9_v6rZ09ehELpnX32CvWg4GParLF_dcQMs4ev4pKBMnVHeUjZ6A/s320/Fotolia_62979459_Subscription_Monthly_M.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
The most common situation is where a mum has a minor illness, a bad cold perhaps, and doesn't want to pass it on to a tiny baby. It is worth remembering that, by the time you are showing symptoms, the baby has already been exposed so switching to formula would not prevent that. In fact, your breastmilk contains the exact antibodies the baby needs to fight off the disease and continuing to breastfeed is likely to be the best protection you can offer your baby. It is also worth bearing in mind the fact that if you stop feeding suddenly you may have problems with engorgement, mastitis and other issues which would make you feel even worse. After a week or so of bottle feeding it can also be difficult to go back to the breast, many mothers find that what was meant to be a short break becomes a permanent change.<br />
<br />
It might surprise you to hear that often illnesses are not present in breastmilk, and even if they are they may pose very little risk. For example, Hepatitis A is found in milk but infection in babies is rare and unlikely to be serious so it is generally thought that there is no need to stop breastfeeding. There are only a few exceptions, such as HIV, where it is best to switch to formula in most cases.<br />
<br />
Many diseases are passed on through skin to skin contact or via droplets (coughs and sneezes) which means the only way to prevent infection would be to separate mother and baby. Most of the time, where mum has something like flu, this would be very extreme and is unnecessary. Taking sensible precautions is more than good enough. However with a few serious conditions, like tuberculosis, the baby does need to be kept away. That doesn't mean they can't have breastmilk though and it is often safe for mum to express milk, which someone else can give to the baby.<br />
<br />
Any mum who is feeling unwell, and anybody else who comes into contact with the baby, can take some simple precautions to reduce the baby's exposure to disease. Washing hands well and as often as possible may seem obvious but can easily be forgotten at home. Any coughs or sneezes should be "caught" in a clean disposable tissue which is immediately thrown away, not kept for re-use. If anyone has a rash, spots or lesions those should be well covered with a bandage. Finally, it is helpful to avoid the baby touching your mouth or nose. Unfortunately that means no kisses for a few days.<br />
<br />
Unless a mother is very ill, breastfeeding is unlikely to put her recovery in any danger. Even mums who are admitted to hospital can sometimes continue breastfeeding if they have the right support. Despite that, breastfeeding while ill is not a particularly pleasant experience and it is important to look after yourself. If at all possible delegate household tasks, including childcare, to other people so that you can go to bed and rest in between feeds. Make sure you are eating well, drinking enough and follow any other advice you are given by the doctor. Many medications are perfectly safe while breastfeeding, so if your doctor knows you are nursing and tells you to take something, take it! You might normally put on a brave face and battle through but now you have to look after yourself, if you don't you won't be able to look after your family.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-21847428876274452012015-08-10T20:04:00.001+01:002015-08-24T14:20:25.376+01:005 Things Children Need to Know Before Starting School<span style="font-family: inherit;">It seems like the summer has only just begun and the shops are already full of back to school bargains! Perhaps it's a shame that children can't just be left in peace to enjoy the holidays, but if you have a little one starting school in September now might be a good time to make sure they are ready. These five things will help them to settle in, cope with the school environment and be ready to learn. They are the things that teachers really want your child to know, and you might be surprised to see the academic knowledge doesn't feature at all! After all, if your child is ready to learn the teacher is there to teach them!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-3nOBu-1I0sU/Vcj1g-WeiwI/AAAAAAAAF-Q/-8PkfOARc3U/s1600/15%2B-%2B1" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-3nOBu-1I0sU/Vcj1g-WeiwI/AAAAAAAAF-Q/-8PkfOARc3U/s320/15%2B-%2B1" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span id="goog_1644515123"></span><span id="goog_1644515124"></span><br /></span>
<br />
<h4>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">1) Going to the toilet</span></h4>
<div style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; line-height: 19px; padding: 0.4em 0px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Most children starting school are clean and dry, by day if not at night, but this is only part of the toilet <span style="color: black; font-family: inherit;">training</span> story. They also need to be able to wipe their bottom, sort their clothes out and wash their </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">hands. Take the time now to show them how to do it for themselves, including how much loo roll or soap to use. It is also important that boys know what a urinal is for. A summer outing is a good opportunity for Dad to take his son into a public loo and show him.</span></div>
<h3 style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-weight: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 1em 0px 0.3em;">
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: small;"><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=2490639223761766864" name="skills_for_starting_school_2" style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"></a></span></h3>
<h4>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">2) Putting on Shoes</span></h4>
<div style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; line-height: 19px; padding: 0.4em 0px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">It doesn’t take long for you to help one child on with her shoes but imagine helping a whole class and it soon becomes a problem. Make sure your child knows how to tell which shoe goes on which foot and how to do them up, even Velcro needs to be pulled tight. If your child is already confident in putting on their shoes it is still a good idea to give them some practice with any new school shoes. </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">This is particularly important with plimsolls or slippers, since right and left can look similar.</span></div>
<div style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; line-height: 19px; padding: 0.4em 0px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<h4>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">3) Recognising their name</span></h4>
<div style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; line-height: 19px; padding: 0.4em 0px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Children don’t need to be able to read or write before they start school but it does make life easier if they can recognise their own name. The child can then find a peg or tray and recognise labels in all that new school uniform. However, <span style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px;">do</span><strong style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"> avoid</strong> teaching your child to write their name in block capitals. As names are so rarely written in capitals they may spend many months, or even years, trying to break the habit.</span></div>
<div style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; line-height: 19px; padding: 0.4em 0px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<h4>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">4) Getting Dressed</span></h4>
<div style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; line-height: 19px; padding: 0.4em 0px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">At school your child will need to get changed for a PE or games lesson, and get back into school uniform afterwards. Encourage them to get dressed independently from now on and it will be a well-practiced skill in September. If you have a choice when buying uniform do bear easy dressing in mind, elasticated trousers or skirts avoid the need for buttons and zips. As well as putting clothes on and off, show your child how to leave things in a neat pile so that they can find them again later.</span></div>
<div style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; line-height: 19px; padding: 0.4em 0px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<h4>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">5) Table Manners</span></h4>
<div style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; line-height: 19px; padding: 0.4em 0px;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Children at school will be expected to sit at the lunch table and, if they have a hot meal, eat with a knife and fork. Many children struggle to stay at the table after they have finished eating. If you normally eat and run now is a good time to encourage sitting and talking for five minutes after each meal. Your child might well enjoy the attention and before long you will value an opportunity to find out about their busy day.</span></div>
<h3 style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; font-weight: normal; margin: 0px; padding: 1em 0px 0.3em;">
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: small;"><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=2490639223761766864" name="skills_for_starting_school_5" style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"></a></span></h3>
<div>
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-33868491073599429672015-08-03T16:14:00.001+01:002015-09-14T14:03:18.580+01:00You are not a bad parent!A lot of my clients are really nervous the first time we speak. They say things like "I know it's selfish but...", "I know it's my fault." or "It probably makes me a bad parent." They are waiting for me to tell them that their child's bad behaviour is down to their unacceptable parenting style, that they are denying their child's basic needs or that everything is their fault and they have failed. Sometimes they feel that even contacting me in the first place is an admission of failure. The truth is, I have never yet had a client who was a bad parent, and I doubt I ever will.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-O-hti0kI3xY/VfbFXtcT0aI/AAAAAAAAGjI/0qKtZzJGriY/s1600/15%2B-%2B1" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-O-hti0kI3xY/VfbFXtcT0aI/AAAAAAAAGjI/0qKtZzJGriY/s320/15%2B-%2B1" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<span id="goog_468564571"></span><br />
<strong>You are not a bad parent.</strong><br />
<br />
<h4>
1) You are reading this</h4>
<br />
Bad parents don't care about their children. They put their own need for drink or drugs above their child's need for food. They beat a child to keep him quiet. They let her roam an unsafe neighbourhood at a very young age because then she isn't pestering them. You get the idea.<br />
<br />
A bad parent doesn't spend time reading parenting blogs. They don't look for help or advice when they don't feel confident. They don't worry about doing this parenting thing well. If you are reading this, you care. And that makes you a good parent.<br />
<br />
<h4>
2) You have done your best</h4>
<br />
If you are anything like my clients then you have always done your best. From giving up certain foods when you were pregnant to investigating local schools you have always wanted to do the best by your children and give them a wonderful start in life. But things in the world of parenting are confusing! Maybe in your pre-child life it was a bit simpler, these are the rules - follow the procedure and you get the required result. Follow the guidelines, apply the formula. In many careers things do work that way. But not with children! Children are complex, with many different things that all affect each other from personality to physical attributes to sleep, food, background. It's a never ending list! Add to that the fact that every expert seems to have a different and opposing view, let alone your mother, sister and Great Aunt Dot. No wonder you might get confused from time to time!<br />
<br />
If you have started down a path that turned out to be the wrong one for your family it doesn't mean you are a bad parent. It means you chose the best option you could with the information available to you at the time. Everybody takes a wrong turn now and then. You just need a good map to get back on track!<br />
<br />
<h4>
3) You have never done this before</h4>
<br />
When you had you first baby, had you ever held a newborn before? If your experience with babies was nothing more than a quick cuddle before handing them back then how on earth could you be expected to get everything right first time? Even if you had done lots of babysitting, or been around younger brothers and sisters, you were never the one in charge. You never had the ultimate responsibility for a small life.<br />
<br />
What other job is there where you are thrown in at the deep end with no training and no supervisor to turn to? I'll tell you right now, I couldn't walk into a doctor's office and start treating patients or represent a client in a courtroom. I would be lost in a newspaper office without instruction. If I had to do those jobs I would need to get someone to train me, show me the way. That isn't failure, it's just being sensible!<br />
<br />
Now, a lot of parenting is instinctual, common sense, or generally known. I'm not saying you need a degree to raise a child. But it's not surprising if you occasionally run into something you need help with, and it doesn't make you a bad parent. Infact recognising that and asking for help makes you a good parent!<br />
<br />
<h4>
4) Your child is unique</h4>
<br />
Your child is not your friend's child, your second baby is not your first all over again, neither of them are the children you imagined before they were born. Every child is unique, and every family is unique. What works for one doesn't work for another, even if they are siblings. The fact that your neighbour's child eats anything, or your mother says you were sleeping through the night by 8 weeks, or your oldest never threw temper tantrums doesn't make you a bad parent. It just means that you are parenting this unique, precious, wonderful child who presents you with unique challenges that you haven't quiet got worked out yet. But you are doing your best, and you will get there!<br />
<br />
If you feel like a bad parent right now, know that I can help you. Whatever you might be struggling with I can help to take away some of the guilt and show you new ways to move forwards. Why not <a href="https://calendly.com/lorna-farrell/discovery" target="_blank">book a free discovery call </a>to find out more?<br />
<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2490639223761766864.post-47164679100939427752015-07-27T20:58:00.000+01:002015-07-27T20:58:10.743+01:00Stop nagging your children!Habits make life much easier, for you and for your children, and mean the end to nagging! You might want your child to form the habit of hanging up his coat when he comes in, putting his shoes away neatly, picking up his toys or saying thank you after meals. Whatever habits you want your child to form, there are some easy ways to help.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiumW2rWnZT8hjYNVINU9IJGEc1bhSCkYFmHJJ56XwFzaDEVX3Q_zrI4jECcyKqFnCgnpL-vmukqvW5xK4hw5pjViXSE1B21eZm5S_itH85n4RqB7lwCMfkcC3JEug68p94e91J7Xg8JX8/s1600/making+bed.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiumW2rWnZT8hjYNVINU9IJGEc1bhSCkYFmHJJ56XwFzaDEVX3Q_zrI4jECcyKqFnCgnpL-vmukqvW5xK4hw5pjViXSE1B21eZm5S_itH85n4RqB7lwCMfkcC3JEug68p94e91J7Xg8JX8/s320/making+bed.jpg" width="213" /></a></div>
<br />
<h4>
Nagging doesn't work</h4>
We all hate to nag, infact sometimes you might get so tired of nagging that you just do the job yourself! The truth is that nagging doesn't really work anyway. Every time a child does something that action is imprinted on their mind, the more often they repeat the action the more firmly it is imprinted until it becomes a default, unthinking habit. But this only happens if the child thinks about what they are doing. When you ask a child to do something you are reinforcing the action "do what mum says," which is valuable in itself, but you are not reinforcing the behaviour as strongly. Instead you want the child to think about what they need to do.<br />
<br />
<h4>
Make it special</h4>
When you first start work on a habit it is a good idea to have a friendly chat with your child, letting them know what is expected of them. This is also a good opportunity to make it fun by getting out the glue and making some props. For example, let's say you want your son to put his shoes neatly by the door when he comes inside. Spend some time making a "shoe spot" showing two footprints side by side and allow your son to decorate it. Laminate the shoe spot or cover it in sticky backed plastic and put it near the door, with his shoes on the footprints. Next time you come home and ask "where do your shoes go?", your son will remember the spot and put his shoes there. At first he may need your help but as he is actively thinking about putting his shoes away it should quickly become a habit. I know one two year old who started putting everyone else's shoes away too!<br />
<br />
<h4>
A sequence</h4>
There are some things that need to be done in the same order, at the same time, every day. The morning routine is a typical example, especially since the school run is much easier if each child gets themselves ready without constant reminders. Here you can make a timeline. One morning spend some time taking photographs of your child at each stage of the routine, waking up, getting dressed, brushing teeth, having breakfast and so on. Take care to include any special jobs they need to do like making their bed. Print out two copies of each picture and tape one set together to make a long strip, in the right order. You can either put this on the wall or lay it out somewhere each morning for your child to use. The other set of pictures go in a box near the timeline and as your child completes each task they can match up the pictures. Even a young child is able to work their way along the line and can easily see which task comes next.<br />
<br />
<h4>
Subtle reminders</h4>
There will be times when you need to remind a child to do something, but you still want to avoid nagging. Sometimes a subtle hint is all you need, such as a pointed look at the coat on the floor, but sometimes you need something a bit stronger. Songs can work well if they are only used in context, many children start to tidy up as soon as they hear the tidy up song! Setting a good example is also a valuable tool. Perhaps you want your daughter to say thank you after a meal. When you have eaten together you might say "my tea was delicious, was your tea nice Daddy?" Daddy then says "Mmm, it was yummy, thank you very much" and you both turn to look expectantly at your daughter, perhaps asking if her food was delicious too. It might seem a bit false to begin with but you are only demonstrating the behaviour you hope to see and as they say, "manners are caught, not taught!" Over time you can be less obvious and saying thank you will soon be that unthinking habit you are hoping for.<br />
<br />
<h4>
Slow progress</h4>
It is highly unlikely that your child will learn everything overnight and to begin with it might even be harder to teach the habit than it would be to just do the task yourself. But time invested now is saved many times over in later years, and life is much more pleasant for everyone when you don't have to nag. For example, if you have decided to use a timeline your little one might be excited by the novelty but need your support in knowing what to do. You have to lead them to the line, ask what they need to do next, help them interpret the picture and it takes a long time. Before long, however, they should be able to run backwards and forwards to check the timeline without help and eventually will complete the morning routine without any prompts at all. The rewards are worth the effort!<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01041188956669937479noreply@blogger.com